Recently Rob and I have been discussing the option of hiring a Doula to attend the birth. For those of you who don't know what a Doula is, they are basically a support person who is there to advocate for the mother and provide support by encouraging the mother to use relaxation techniques during labour and delivery. Statistically speaking they lessen your chances of needing a Cesarean section, lessens the length of labour, lessens your need for forceps & vacuum delivery, lessens the use of medications needed and lessens your likelihood of developing post partum depression. Sounds pretty good right? Unfortunately the only drawback is that they charge for their services (and rightly so... its a lot of work) and the cost can range from $250-$1000, which is a significant expense for someone who doesn't actually deliver the baby.
We met our potential doula a few months ago at a Prenatal Health Fair. She was set up there with a table all about breastfeeding. She is a certified Lactation Consultant and the leader of La Leche League in our area. At the health fair she answered several questions I had about breastfeeding and was very personable, approachable and Rob and I immediately liked her. We didn't know at this point that she was a doula. A few days later we started our prenatal classes only to walk in and discover that she was the instructor of the 7 week course. A very pleasant surprise.
Over the last 5 weeks we've been able to develop a very close relationship with her and she's kind of taken on a maternal role in our lives just because she's so approachable and informed on all things baby related. She has some pretty strong convictions (which we agree with) which are based on years of experience being a doula, as well as being a mother of 4.
Recently as part of the course homework, we had to create our birth plans, basically a list of wishes for our labour and delivery experience. After taking several hours going through item by item, Rob and I discovered just how difficult it may be to make sure the Ob/Nurses acknowledge our wishes. Sometimes they have their own agenda or are in a hurry to get their tasks done, and can overlook the importance to the mother of certain issues. We also realized that given how intense, long and painful labour can be, we may not be coherent enough to make decision at the time and may agree with a nurses suggestion out of pure delirium instead of really wanting what she's suggesting. What we needed is someone who will stay calm amongst the chaos and will advocate our wishes when we are unable to do so for whatever reason. That's when we first heard about a doula.
We've now spent a few weeks discussing it and our list of positive benefits is growing even longer. In terms of pain management, if at any point Rob is too exhausted or in desperate need of a break, there would be someone there to take over, even better that it would be the person who taught Rob what to do! The real benefit we see is that she could speak up for us. She isn't afraid of a nurses reaction or offending the OB (whom she actually knows quite well) and we know that she would tell them exactly what we want. For instance, we've really learned the importance of breast feeding immediately after the baby is born, not 20 mins later after they have cleaned the baby off, weighed it, measured it and wrapped it.. it needs to happen when the baby is first born so you can have skin to skin contact. Its proven to help de-stress the baby since it finds the mothers scent comforting and the skin to skin helps regulate temperature. There is no reason the baby needs to be over in the corner bonding with the nurse for 20 mins when they can suction and check the baby's colour right there on your chest. Small things like that are important to us, but we may forget to mention that until its too late.
We're still wavering currently only because of financial reasons, but every day we lean more and more towards hiring her. She's there for the entire labour and delivery experience and she also comes back and helps you after wards at home to make sure the transition is going well. Plus the fact that she is a lactation consultant means any difficulties I may have in that area would be dealt with immediately and not 2 or 3 days later when I can get an appointment with the hospital consultant.
Some people consider a doula a luxury expense, but considering what you spend on a crib, swing, stroller, bouncer, high chair, jolly jumper, and everything else, whats a few hundred dollars to have peace of mind knowing your wishes will be met and your baby got off to the best possible start?
