Modern medicine fails

As per my previous posts, Ali has been battling a horrible diaper rash pretty much since birth. We have gone to the doctor twice and were applying an anti-fungal cream as well a steroid ointment. The rash would clear up for a day and then come back worse than before. She was screaming anytime she had to poop and her bum was so red and raw that I hated having to wipe her clean as she would always cry.

Fed up and frustrated, I turned to the internet for other ideas. At this point I had tried changing diaper, wipes, all different kinds of diaper rash cream and left her naked for days on end... Nothing worked. The internet was filled with people battling the same thing but no one seemed to have the magic cure.

I had also noticed she had become quite acidic. Her stools had an odd odor to them. I decided to call the naturopath in town to see what they would suggest. Apparently the "acid" problem was in fact caused by anti-fungal creams. The very thing the doctor told me to use was causing a Dr worse issue.

The owner of the natural store in town gave me a sample of a cream called mayan magic and a tub of acidophilis yogurt. I was to rub the yogurt on her butt every diaper change throughout the day and then apply the mayan magic at night. She told me I'd see a change pretty much immediately.

I was skeptical but not in a position to argue so I tried it. The next morning, literally, her butt was about 75% better. I stuck with it and she had a normal looking bum by day 2. I didn't want to get to excited because we have had this false hope before, but now its been an entire week and she hasn't had one single trace of a rash. The acid in her poop is gone. She no longer screams when going to the bathroom or when I wipe her clean.

I am now a believer that maybe modern medicine isn't always the answer. I'll be sticking with this mayan magic cream for as long as she is in diapers and recommending it to anyone with a diaper rash problem!

Growing Girl!

Ali had her 2 month check-in with the doctor today. She weighed in at 11 lbs 1 oz and measured out to 23 inches long. That makes her in the 50th percentile for both, perfectly average.

It was also the day she got her first needles. She was less than impressed. With the first one, she let out a little cry, but the second one caused a much louder wail. I was able to pick her up immediately after and she stopped crying as quickly as she began. By the time I was buckling her into her car seat she was smiling at the funny faces I was making and by the time we hit the car she was fast asleep. What a trooper!

Mommy's second month

I have to admit that the first month had me kind of worried. I thought if she continued on eating every 2 hours at night that I was going to crumble out of sleep deprivation, but can happily report that now that she has a fairly predictable schedule, the transition into motherhood has become much easier. Halfway through this past month Ali began sleeping for 4-5 hour stretches at night, which meant my 3 hours of sleep total for the night went up to about 6 hours. What a difference it makes! I finally was about to feel like a person again instead of a walking zombie. They say a new mother loses 800 hours of sleep over the course of a year and I believe it. Gone are the days of sleeping for 12 hours, but its surprising how you just get used to functioning on less sleep.

This month was also much better for me because the pain from the delivery had subsided and Ali and I worked hard at perfecting our breast feeding technique, so now its second nature. There's no more worrying that she isn't latching correctly, or that she isn't eating enough. She has clear cues for when she's hungry and clear cues for when she's full. Learning her cues has really helped prevent any spitting up from over filling her tummy and therefore saved me a lot of laundry!

The pregnancy hormones are starting to settle down, so the endless emotional ups and downs have begun to settle as well. The draw back to the drop in hormones is the hair loss and the acne. I had such amazing skin and hair while I was pregnant and I had my fingers crossed that it would stay that way, but about 2 weeks ago I noticed a few strands of hair clinging to my shirts and a few red bumps popping up along my jaw line. It should level out in a few weeks when the hormones reach a consistent level again.

The other major change I wasn't expecting was the bottomless pit otherwise known as my stomach. I barely wanted to eat while I was pregnant, but now that I'm breast feeding I am constantly hungry. I've chatted with a few other breast feeding moms and they said the same thing, that they eat far more now then when they were pregnant. I guess its natures way of making sure you have energy to keep producing enough milk.

I feel like everything in my life is starting to mesh well again. Because we have developed a good routine I feel I can manage my time much better now. I have plenty of time to spend with Ali and attend to her needs, as well as plenty of time to keep up on the household chores like laundry, dishes and making dinner every night. Given that she is asleep every night by 8pm, it also allows Rob and I to connect and enjoy each others company without worrying about the baby. Even Jake is reaping the benefits. He knows that as soon as Ali goes to bed its his turn for a good 45 min wrestle or tug of war or game of fetch.

All in all, the second month has been a blast. Ali has developed more personality and is interested in a range of toys and songs and best of all, walking into her room at 6am I know ill be greeted with an ear to ear smile and that makes getting up early totally worth it!

2 months old already!

Where did the time go? Its been 8 weeks since my little bundle of joy made her way into our lives and I can't believe how much she has changed already. She is a completely different baby than the helpless sleepy one I brought home from the hospital. She has personality now. She smiles, coos and gurgles, watches and takes swipes at hanging toys and loves to study the faces of people holding her. Every day it seems she develops some new skill or personality trait.

The first real smiles were a huge deal. As I previously posted it almost brought me to tears when I walked in the room and she recognized me and smiled at my presence. It made all those sleepless nights becomes a distant memory. Now, a few weeks from that very first smile, she smiles non-stop. Rob and I sing silly little songs to her and she smiles so much it basically lights up the room. Her current favourite is "Toe Knee Chest Nut" which is an action song and it never fails to make her smiles and even give a little giggle at the end.

Her vision has improved even further, along with her hearing. The other day we were visiting her grandparents and while grandpa was holding her I walked from one side of the room to the other while talking and she tracked me the entire way. She has definitely become some what of a mama's girl, which is to be expected since she is with me for the majority of the day.

Sleeping wise I feel we are pretty lucky. From early on, we created a bedtime routine with starts with a bath, then a story with daddy, and a last feed, then she gets placed in her crib to fall asleep at 7:30pm. I'm not of the "cry it out" method, so if she were to cry I would pick her up, calm her down, then place her back in her bed, but honestly that has never been an issue. At 7:30pm, when she is placed in her crib with her soother, she looks around for a few mins, or stares at her mobile and then falls asleep. No muss, no fuss. Occasionally she might spit out her soother before she's truly asleep and sqwirm around until I put it back in, but then falls right back asleep. Once she is out, the soother falls out and she stays asleep for a good 5-6 hours before she wakes to nurse. Then she eats, goes right back to sleep for another 4-5 hours. Its been nice to finally get some sleep myself. Those first few weeks I felt like I never caught a wink of sleep.

Due to how well she is sleeping at night, she is awake and alert for much longer periods of time during the day now. This has been great because we've been able to get out and enjoy the world. She has really taken a liking to going swimming and we try to get to nursery swim at the local pool once or twice a week. We've also joined a baby massage class on Tuesdays for the month of April and so far she loves the rub downs. They teach silly little songs to go along with the different body parts and she just smiles away whenever I sing them.

She has also grown much more than I expected. When I got her weighed at 6 weeks she had already gained 3 lbs and grown 2 inches. She has a very long torso, which has caused her to outgrow most of her newborn and 3 month onesies already. She's still in newborn and 0-3 pants because she has average length legs and a skinny waist, but is into 6 month shirts and sleepers to accommodate her torso length. She gets weighed in again this coming Wednesday and I can't wait to see how much more she has grown. She is definitely a healthy and happy girl.

Unfortunately we are still battling the yeast rash. She's been back to the doctor and we are continuing with the prescription creams but it still hasn't completely gone away. Now I am changing things in my diet to see if that helps her clear up. Its been over 7 weeks now and I am beyond frustrated with it. The doctor will be re-examining it at her appointment on Wednesday and hopefully he has some other solution.

Milestone wise, most recently she has decided she wants to try and sit up. She has had an extremely strong neck right from birth and has been holding her head up at my shoulder for weeks now. The other day when I had her leaning on the breast feeding pillow she just decided she was going to try and sit right up. She held it for a few seconds before laying back down and that caused Rob and I to look at each other and ask "what just happened". We thought we were months away from her sitting up, but she might just surprise us. She also has incredibly strong legs and constantly wants to stand up while we hold onto her waist or when we hold her against our body she uses whatever ledge she can find to push herself into a standing position. I really wouldn't be surprised if she skips crawling all together and goes straight to walking before we know it!

5 weeks old

6 weeks old

7 weeks old

8 weeks old

Diaper Rash Dilemma

For the past few weeks Ali has had a diaper rash that just wont quit. I have tried everything to get rid of it. From switching diaper brands, using different creams, powders, pastes, airing her bum out, not using wipes, just water to clean her, etc. The rash will look like it has cleared up and then the next day it comes right back. It has been incredibly frustrating for me and I'm sure plenty uncomfortable for her.

I was finally able to get her in to see her doctor and it turns out that she had a yeast diaper rash. Since Ali is a breast fed newborn, her bum constantly leaks. She is always going poop and because of that all the moisture on her skin it becomes a breeding ground for bacteria. The yeast that developed in this moisture is a fungus that thrives in warm wet places and it keeps regenerating, so that's why I couldn't get rid of it with normal diaper rash treatments. Luckily once it was determined that it was yeast, the treatment was fairly simple. The doctor gave me a prescription for an anti-fungal cream and another for corticosteroid cream which both get applied twice daily and expose her bum to air.

I wanted the rash gone sooner rather than later because it was causing her quite a bit of discomfort so I decided to let her go diaper-less for an entire day. The first night was fairly easy. I put a towel down in her crib and let her sleep with just a long sleeve t-shirt on. She doesn't go to the bathroom while she sleeps, so the only time i had to clean up messes was when she woke up to eat. The next day however, was not as simple.

She is staying awake and alert for several hours at a time now, and during these awake periods she likes to be quite active... kicking her feet, doing tummy time, trying to roll around.. I put towels on top of garbage bags on the floor and in her play pen to protect the surface, but allow for to do her business. I spent the entire day constantly wiping her bum to keep it dry and changing towel after towel. By 6pm the improvement in her rash was amazing. Her bum was finally looking less inflamed and on its way to looking normal.

I had remembered hearing about a diaper-less training for newborns during one of my prenatal classes. I hopped on the internet and googled away. Up popped "elimination communication". Its basically learning to read your baby's cues/patterns for when they need to go to the bathroom, then holding them in a squatting position over the toilet and letting them do their business. I watched a few you tube videos on how it was done and was intrigued, if only for the fact that I'd have less towels to wash.

I knew she always pees right after waking up and again right after nursing, so when she woke up from her nap, I picked her up, went into the bathroom, straddled the toilet and held her against me in a squatting position. Rob was laughing at me because I looked ridiculous. As were joking around about how this was never gonna work, low and behold she peed! I was so shocked and surprised that it actually worked!

I attempted this again every time she woke up throughout the night and it worked every single time. I didn't have to change one towel. This was so much easier than constantly cleaning up her and her messes.

Given that the rash was improving but still there, I left her diaper-less for another entire day. She managed to do every single pee in the toilet and even a few poops but they are much harder to time since she goes all the time all day long.

After 60 hours without a diaper, I can happily report that her rash has pretty much disappeared. I'll be continuing the creams for another 2 weeks just to make sure all the fungus has disappeared, but so far it looks good. We will still be using diapers but will be continuing the elimination communication method a few times a day, likely at night and after naps. Perhaps exposing her to the toilet now with make potty training that much easier down the road. Guess we'll wait and see!

She knows me!

I was going to wait to post this with her 2 month old blog but I just had to share.

This morning after Ali finished nursing, Rob was able to take her and play with her so that I could get some sleep. I managed to sleep for about 2.5 hours and when I got up, I walked in to see Ali, who was having her bum changed and she looked right at me and smiled the biggest smile she's ever had.

This may not seem like much to people who don't have kids yet, but this was the first time it was completely apparent that she knew who I was and was happy to see me. She recognized her "mommy"! After 5 weeks of sleepless nights and an endless amount of cuddles, to be rewarded with a bright eyed, heart warming smile made my day!

Mommy's first month

I know I mentioned it in my last blog post, but I really cant believe its been a month already. The days just fly by because I never really have a chance to sit down. Its been endlessly amazing, but also endlessly exhausting. I know it will be months before I get a good nights sleep again, so I'm slowly adjusting and trying to become a morning person (by far the most difficult part yet)

We had a reunion with our prenatal class participants this past Monday. It was pretty awesome to see everyone and their new babies. Our of the 7 couples, we ended up with 4 girls (Alison, Charlotte, Sunna, and Ada) and 3 boys (Simon, Wesley, and Owen). During the class we got to share our birth stories and I have to say, I feel like I got off pretty lucky. A few of the women ended up having difficult births. For instance, one woman was pushing for 4 hours, only to end up having to have a c-section because the baby just wouldn't drop. Another pushed for 3 hours and then the doctor had to do an episiotomy with forceps delivery. Sounds pretty horrific compared to my 30 minutes of pushing.

We also discussed post-birth adjustments. They mentioned the dreaded post-partum depression, and although no one seems to be experiencing it in a severe way, we've all had our moments of being completely overwhelmed. I totally understand why some women do get it. Its incredibly overwhelming and exhausting to have a newborn and you end up feeling like a failure half the time because you have no idea how to fix what's wrong with the baby sometimes. There really are moments where you feel like your not going to be able to do it anymore, where you need a break and where you just have to break down and shed a few tears, but those moments fade as quickly as they come. Hormones really are a bitch.

For me, because Ali isn't a crier, I haven't had the luxury of deciphering her cries. Most mothers get to know that their baby's high pitched cry means hunger and the low pitch means the baby needs a diaper change. For me, I basically have to go through the list and gradually rule out what's causing her fussiness. I always start with hunger because that's generally what she wants. Then move on to diaper, followed by just wanting to be held/cuddled, to checking her temperature (too hot/too cold).

She's generally pretty easy to settle, but the one that really stressed me out the first time was when she became over-tired. You end up going through your entire list of arsenal to get her to fall asleep (feeding/rocking/bouncing/bath/swinging/snugli/etc) and then just as you're about to rip your hair out in frustration, she passes out. Go figure!

Then once she passes out, you have to decide between eating, napping or showering because there won't be time to do all three. You gotta prioritize. How bad do I smell? How greasy is my hair? Can it wait until tomorrow so I can catch an hour of sleep? lol... Its kinda sad. Most days its 3pm before I realize I haven't made it out of my pajamas. The other day I managed to grab an hour and a half nap while she slept. Upon waking, since she was still sleeping, I thought I would press my luck and hop in the shower. Low and behold, the moment I grabbed the shampoo bottle, she woke up! Then it turns into a speed shower. If that were an Olympic event, I bet a new mother would win gold every time.

On another note, I'm not quite sure how people are unable to lose their pregnancy weight. I seriously don't have time to eat most days. I remember one of the first few days home I popped down a bagel into the toaster and 3 hours later when I walked back through the kitchen, I saw my sad lonely fully toasted bagel still sitting in the toaster waiting for me. I actually had to start writing down what I did manage to eat so I could make sure I was actually consuming something every day. I was pretty lucky to not gain that much weight to begin with, but by 2 weeks after delivery I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight and into my regular jeans again.

Everywhere I go as a new mother all I hear is "it gets easier" and I know its true. Its already much easier now at 4 weeks old than it was at 1 week old. The periods of sleep have gone from 2 hours long to 3 hours at a time. I've also started getting her on a routine at night (bath/quiet time/feeding/bed) which has really helped us both.

It really has been a life changing transition for me and I try to take it all in stride and with an excellent sense of humour. Between every moment of exhaustion and tears are hilarious stories I'll remember for the rest of my life.

Ali's First Month

I can't believe she is almost one month old already. It feels like it was just yesterday that we were in the hospital. Time really is flying by but I guess that tends to happen when one day blends into the next. With the lack of sleep there is no clear start or end to a day anymore. Parenting is a round the clock job and is has been a big adjustment. Its by far the hardest job I've ever had, yet absolutely the most rewarding.

I thought I would try and keep this blog going for awhile and share my thoughts as she grows. As you can already see the posts are much further apart. I just don't have the time or mental capacity currently (due to sleep deprivation) to be blogging every week, but since I really do enjoy writing, I will attempt to keep it updated as she reaches milestones.

Where to start... As I mentioned this first month has been a whirlwind. Everyone knows that the new baby is the boss and your life now revolves around her. It did take a few weeks to adjust to her schedule. The days of me sleeping in until noon are long gone and now I'm lucky to get 2 hours uninterrupted. Everyone and their neighbour mentioned the lack of sleep part while I was pregnant, but until you are confronted with it face to face, it really doesn't sink in.

Pretty consistently since birth Ali has wanted to eat every 2.5 hours. Since I'm breastfeeding, there really isn't any sharing of responsibility in that area. During the first 6 weeks its not advised to use bottles (if it can be avoided) because it can lead to nipple confusion and that can mean they will have a difficult time getting a proper latch when breastfeeding. I really enjoy nursing her. Its our quiet time together where I can talk to her, sing her songs and look into her eyes. No matter whats going on in our day, or who is over visiting her, I know that every 2.5 hours I get to have her all to myself. There have been times, particularly as 4am when I'm exhausted, that I really wish Rob had the ability to breast feed, but then I go pick her up, sit in the rocking chair and realize I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I consider myself very lucky. Ali is a very quiet baby and doesn't really ever cry. I think in the 4 weeks she has been here, I've heard her cry maybe 6 or 7 times and that's only when I really can't help her at that exact moment (ei, she becomes hungry while I'm driving down the highway) other than that she is very content to just look around and take in her surroundings. She is great with new people and noise doesn't bother her in the least. Just yesterday I was vacuuming her room while she was napping in her crib. The only noises she does seem to make are grumbles. She grumbles while eating, sleeping, stretching, and pooping. Its quite adorable to hear these deep rooted grumblings coming out of such a tiny being. The first few times she grumbled in her sleep we would leap out of bed expecting her to be waking up, but she just grumbled away and kept on dreaming. I will gladly listen to her grumble for the next year rather than have her crying or screaming.

Milestone wise, the only major things to happen in the past 4 weeks, were the losing of the umbilical cord and having her eyes focus on an object. With the umbilical cord the hospital told us it would take 10 days to 3 weeks for her to lose it. To our surprise, on her 4th day of life, I went to change her diaper and noticed her black nub dangling from her onesie. I was shocked that she lost it so early, and honestly a little concerned, but after talking to some other parents realized it was perfectly ok to lose it that early if it had dried up and fallen off on its own, which it had. I was quite excited to because it finally meant she could have a bath in a tub instead of just a sponge bath. She hated the sponge bath (I don't blame her), but once she was in the warm bathtub she enjoyed every minute of it. We sing songs while lathering up every body part and then rinsing off. I look forward to when she will be able to sit in the big tub and play with toys during her bath time routine.

As for her eyes, she was able to see just a few inches from her face when she was born but now she looks at me and locks eyes. She sees her mobile on her swing and looks around at everything while she's awake. It was fantastic the first time she looked "at" me instead of "towards" me. Completely warmed my heart to see my daughter looking into my eyes. Soon she will be accompanying those gazes with smiles and laughter and then I have a feeling I will do everything I can to make her laugh all the time.

I can't believe how quickly she has grown already. When we brought her home we had to go out and buy a few "newborn" outfits because all the clothing we had for her was far too big. Now there is a box beside her change table quickly filling up with outfits and hats that are too small. Its hard for a parent to see since I stare at her daily, but looking back in photos its clear to see she gotten significantly larger. When we left the hospital she had dropped to 7 lbs even, and now she is already up over 8 lbs.

I was also shocked at how much he face has changed already. The swelling from the delivery has gone down and her features have really developed. Of course the first thing anyone who sees her tries to do is figure out which parent she looks like, and so far consensus is that she looks a lot like Rob. She definitely has Rob's eye shape/socket and his chin, which are the most noticeable features, but has my eye colour, hair colour, ears and nose. It will be interesting to see how that changes as she ages. Personality wise she obviously isn't showing anything significant yet, but she sleeps/wakes up like her father, meaning when she falls asleep she is out like a light, and when she wakes up its a very gradual process, whereas I on the other hand, struggle to fall asleep but when its time to get up, I'm up bright eyed and ready to go. I really love watching her grow and develop and become her own little person!

2 Days old

4 days old

10 days old

16 days old

20 days old

Video made for Alison

Throughout the course of my pregnancy I pieced together pictures and thoughts into a video montage for Alison about her journey into this world. Hopefully one day she will be able to look at it and realize just how much she was loved before she even made her grand entrance into this world.

Post pregnancy pitfalls

Nobody ever tells you how much pain you will be in after you give birth. You hear all about how tired you will be because they baby doesn't sleep, and how you're life in general changes, but the mother is often over looked once the baby arrives. Its almost as though its a taboo topic, too personal, which is funny because giving birth is about as intimate as you can get.

I definitely wasn't prepared for stitches in my lady regions to be so sore that i'd rather stand all day then attempt to sit down. I walk at a pace that is so slow turtles could pass me and trying to get in and out of a vehicle has never been more difficult. At almost a week post delivery I can finally sit down in the bathtub without asking for help getting back up. I know its only a few more days before things get better down there but its been a difficult week.

Then there is the sore nipples. I now completely understand women who say breast feeding too difficult or try it and quit within a week or two. It is a challenge. Lucky for Ali I don't give up easy. I know the benefits of breastfeeding will far exceed the temporary discomfort I'm feeling and the every time it does indeed get a little easier. Its a learning curve for both Ali and I, but by next week I'm sure her and I will be pros.

The last pitfall I am experiencing I know not every woman does. Because my water broke more than 24 hours before I delivered Ali, they had to constantly pump me full of fluid to keep things hydrated. Little did I know (and no nurse ever mentioned it) my entire body would remain water logged for weeks. My feet, ankles, toes, calves, knees, and basically everything below my belly button is swollen to two or three times its original size. I have sausages for toes and my once tiny ankles are now referred to as the dreaded cankles. When Ali had her first doctor's appointment I asked my GP if there was anything I could do about it and he said "Nope. It'll go away eventually in a few weeks". I stared at him blankly just thinking "WEEKS"..... I tell ya, its a good thing I own a lot of flip flops because that's the only footwear that fits currently.

Aside from the few pitfalls that make the days slightly more difficult, being a mother is everything I hoped it would be and more. Its amazing how quickly you can fall in love with such a tiny little person. She is perfection in my eyes. Its hard to believe that a week ago she was in my tummy! In hindsight, the 9 months seemed to fly by even though while I was waiting for her it seemed to drag and drag. Life will literally never be the same, and I couldn't be happier! .